


In which gender is imprecise (and Hermann is having none of it)

by slightly_oblivvyous



Series: Newmann in 1000 Words or Less [12]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Agender Character, M/M, Mild Transphobia, Newt's still learning okay?, agender!Hermann, more like ignorance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-26
Updated: 2014-12-26
Packaged: 2018-03-03 16:46:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2857853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightly_oblivvyous/pseuds/slightly_oblivvyous
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Self) Prompt: But what if Hermann was agender because xe just couldn’t reconcile xir precise mathematics with the RIDICULOUSLY IMPRECISE gender system??</p><p>Hermann is agender and Newt doesn't know what to do with this knowledge. (warning for mild transphobia due to ignorance)</p><p>(I guess it's technically not 1000 words or less after that second chapter but WELP.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was literally the first fic I ever wrote, and I hesitated about putting it here, but as a Christmas present to you guys: A look at Livvy's first attempt at ficcing.
> 
> PS. If you leave Hermann-specific slang ideas in the comments I will adore you forever.

"—and they just won’t listen to me, dude."

"Newton, could you please not call me ‘dude’?"

"I’m not gonna call you Doctor Gottlieb all the time, man."

"Yes, I realize that," Hermann sighed. "However this has less to do with your unprofessional informality than with such terms being simply inaccurate."

"What? Dude, you’re not a woman. …Are you?" Newton eyed Hermann’s chest suspiciously as though it had been hiding something from him.

Hermann rolled xir eyes.  _"Regardless_  of my anatomical structure, I identify as neither. The whole system of gender is mathematically imprecise; there’s simply too much variation to pin down in a single binary or even fractional system! And I REFUSE to tolerate such imprecision in my identity. I assumed you, as a biologist, would understand that gender is not—"

"Hey man, uh, not man, um... Herms!" Newt raised his hands defensively. "Hey Herms, that’s cool, I mean, I don’t get it, but I can roll with it, y’know?" He dropped his hands slowly as a smile spread across his face, and Hermann suspected xe wouldn’t like whatever idea had just formed in Newton’s head. "You realize I’m going to have to come up with a whole new set of pet terms just for you, right? There’s no escaping ‘Herms’ now. How do you feel about ‘doc’? ‘Professor’? No, that’s too… uh, no." Newton began to redden slightly. "Y’know what, I’ll work on it. One Hermann-specific slang system, coming right up."

Hermann made a great show of ignoring Newton, but xe couldn’t stop xirself from smiling fondly at the chalkboard all the same.

 

———

 

"Newton, what are you doing?"

"Hugging you, obviously," Newt said from Hermann’s shoulder.

"Well yes, but why?"

"You don’t always need a reason to hug someone, Herms."

"No, however this is the third time you’ve hugged me in as many days without explanation, so clearly you are up to something. I ask you again, what precisely are you doing?"

After a long pause, Newton’s muffled voice responded tentatively, "... Investigating?"

"Investigating  _what_? My patience? What could you possibly hope to gain from…” Hermann leveled an accusing glare at Newt’s hair. "Newton, have you been trying to determine whether or not I have breasts?"

"Nnnmayyyybe?" Newt broke the hug and stepped back under Hermann’s glare. "I just, I’m curious! You seemed so normal and, well, not  _normal_ really, but… look, you’re physically a guy, right? Your body is male?"

"My  _body_ displays traits typical of a Y chromosome, yes, although my anatomy hardly seems your business unless you were planning on engaging with it, so—" Hermann’s eyes widened as Newton turned an uncomfortable shade of pink. " _Were_ you?"

"It… might have crossed my mind a few times?" Newt shrank from the anger evident on Hermann’s face. "Look, sorry, I shouldn’t have—"

"I am not a  _point of curiosity_ , Newton! I am not some… some LAB SPECIMEN for you to poke at and satisfy your—"

Newt shook his head frantically, backing away from the cane waving dangerously in Hermann’s hand. "What, no! No, doc, not like, I would never— !"

"Then what interest could you possibly have in my secondary sex— … _oh_." Hermann lowered xir cane slowly, never once taking xir eyes off Newton’s pained face. "I see." Hermann cleared xir throat and straightened up. "Well, next time you find yourself thinking about such things, you might do better to simply ask me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have important calculations to attend to."

Hermann turned away, leaving a stunned Newton crouching in the middle of the lab. As xe reached the chalkboard, Newton squeaked behind xir, "So does that mean I…"

"Yes, Newton?" Hermann prompted.

"Um, dinner tonight, Hermann?"

"Yes, Newton."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Newt and Hermann discuss pronouns.

"Hey, Hermsh," Newton called around a mouthful of rice. "What prononsh dyu—"

"If you insist on talking while I’m working, Newton,  _please_  don’t do it with your mouth full." Newton swallowed with an obnoxious noise and Hermann barely suppressed an exasperated huff. "Now, what were you saying?"

"I was asking what pronouns you wanted me to use. I was talking to Tendo about you and then realized I hadn’t asked so—"

"You were what." Hermann’s voice went flat and xe tightened xir grip on the chalk.

"I was talking to Tendo abooouuuu… should I not have done that?" The beginnings of uncertain guilt crept into Newt’s features.

"No, Newton, you should not have done that," Hermann said tightly.

"Aw shit, I fucked up again, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize it was a big secret, but I guess I should have figured since I’ve known you for years and literally just found out, but—"

"Newton,  _please_!" Newt’s jaw snapped shut with an audible click while Hermann pinched the bridge of xir nose and took a deep breath. "Did you mention it to anyone else?"

"Just Tendo."

"Good, that’s… fine, Tendo is trustworthy, and I doubt this is new to him. In fact, I’d be surprised if he identified as 100% male either."

"I don’t think Tendo identifies as  _completely_ anything."

"Wrong!" Tendo’s voice rang out behind them, nearly causing Newt to spill his rice all over the desk. "I identify as 100% awesome and completely good at what or whomever I do." He settled with his hip against Newt’s desk and plucked a piece of chicken from the rice bowl.

"Naturally," Hermann said dryly, discarding the now-broken piece of chalk. "You might also wish to add ‘addicted to coffee’ to that list."

"I can stop annnny time," Tendo drawled, taking a sip from the mug in his hand.

"Right. And that’s your, what, eighth cup today?"

"Tenth, but who’s counting?" Tendo grinned. "So what were you two chatting about before my ears started burning?"

"We were, um… oh!" Newton finally snapped back to himself, jabbing chopsticks at Tendo’s thieving fingers. "Pronouns! Hermann, what pronouns should I use for you? I mean, if you don’t mind Tendo hearing?"

Tendo moved to stand, but Hermann waved for him to stay. "Well I’m rather partial to the xe/xir system, but you may continue using he/him if it’s more convenient."

"Nah-ah, no way pal, I’ve already made an ass of myself, I should at least  _try_  to use what makes you comfortable."

"Honestly Newton, I’d rather you didn’t, except maybe when speaking with Tendo. I’m not eager to explain my identity to the entire PPDC, nor do I relish the prospect of less… gentle attempts to discern my sex."

Tendo fixed Newt with a look of amused suspicion. "What did you  _do_?"

"Nothing!" Newt protested, his cheeks pinkening. "I just hugged hi— xir a lot!"

"You ass!" Tendo laughed, snatching two pieces of chicken while Newt was distracted. "You could have just asked!"

"I told him as much as well," Hermann nodded.

"I thought, I mean, it wasn’t  _really_  my business, so I didn’t—"

Hermann put xir hand on Newton’s shoulder and said, voice deliberately soft, "I thought I made it clear that it could become your business."

There was a moment of charged silence between them until Tendo whistled long and low. "I’m not sure if I should walk out now or tell you how much I want in."

" _What_??" Hermann snapped and Newton fairly squeaked in unison.

"Right, going, going." Tendo stood and backed out, taking the rest of Newt’s rice with him. Just before the door closed on the two flustered scientists, he called out, "Don’t forget my offer!"

(“Do you suppose his offer was genuine?”

"Was  _your_  offer genuine?”

"Oh yes, Newton, quite."

"… oh.")


End file.
